A schizophrenic and mind numbing movie. Who knew that so much action could be so boring?

I ’m not break to spend too much fourth dimension writing this critique because I ’m quite sure that it ’s irrelevant . Based on the reaction of the consultation at the screening I go to , most folks will not agree with this review article , will go watchTransformersand entrust the theater in a state of bliss .

Me ? I just do n’t get it .

Over the weekend I actually get going to get excited about this movie base on the early reviews that had been coming out . I just checkedRottentomatoes.comand although in the overall class it ’s just scantily slide into " lousy " soil , the " Cream of the Crop " reviewer consensus is still well into " Ripe " ( meaning near ) . Over atIMDB.comthe exploiter military rank stands at 8.3 out of 10 at the fourth dimension of this composition .

In a dusty landscape Finn stares out into the distance in Star Wars: The Force Awakens

I can only reason out that all these people are on crack .

First off , get me say that for anyone who survive to see this movie and is NOT on crack , the ONLY reasonableness to see it is Shia LaBeouf , who plays Sam ( this last name shall be eternally mispronounced and is a escape jest ) Witwicky , the teenage kid who ends up in will power of the Transformer identify Bumblebee , who morphs into at first a classic but beat up old Camaro and then the latest ( and admittedly incredibly coolheaded looking ) new model . The kid is a lifelike and his delivery on sieve was worthy of an one-time - time , seasoned comedian . He had me laugh out loud during the first 2/3 of the flick or so and his line were very well written as well .

For me , that was it . earnestly .

Kaitlyn Santa Juana as Stefanie looking horrified in Final Destination Bloodlines

About 2 proceedings in , you know you ’re catch a Michael Bay ™ moving picture . There ’s just something about the way he shoot large scale conniption that gives him away - and then there ’s the music … is it me or does he utilise pretty much the same medicine in every flaming motion picture he ’s ever made ?

On the positive side , what at first seemed bracing was the comedic relief with Shia , his papa and even Bernie Mac . Although I ’ve never been a grownup fan of Mac , I think he fit really well in his brief appearance . On the other hand for much of the film I felt like I was watch two ( and sometimes three ) dissimilar motion-picture show that had been spliced together . It made me feel schizoid because these section were all altogether different in tone . We had the Shia comedy , the high-pitched - government activity serioius ( and mostly , ridiculous ) lot , and then the problematical - military - action mechanism - hero movie . These were inter - slue in such a way that was , for lack of a better word : jarring .

Oh sure , theTransformerslooked cool , if you could ever get a clear smell at them . Bay is one of the major contributor to lend in the juvenility of the mod world . There was so much movement on the screen during the battle sequences , and the transformer had so many moving part that honesly , most of the time I could n’t narrate WHAT the hell was going on , and basically I just checked out .

Ben Affleck as Christian drumming his hand on the table while talking to Cynthia Addai-Robinson’s Marybeth in The Accountant 2

Let me disclose that I ’m not and never have been aTransformersfan . It ’s not that I have any animus towards the dealership - I just never paid it any attention . Apparently however , there were many fans in the audience , and by their chemical reaction they were enough happy . I have aboveboard never been so confused by an consultation during a moving-picture show . There were all kinds of whoops and hollers during certain scenes , and I understood that the movie was TRYING to educe that reaction at those points , but for me every single one of them descend flat .

Every . Single . One .

Never did I think that a picture with so much activity could be so incredibly boring . In my review ofRatatouilleI mentioned that I was full of anticipation as to what would happen next and how the motion picture might terminate . WithTransformersI quite literally just did not care . I actually debating just leaving part way through because I was so bored and numb from all the pointless action , but I figured I call for to look on the integral affair if I was endure to brush up it .

Optimus Prime looking forward in Transformers

Oh sure , there ’s middle candy with Megan Fox as the gamey school " hot skirt " that LeBeouf is yearn for and there ’s Rachael Taylor as an utterly unbelievable computer expert . But outside of Shia ’s humor , the stuff and nonsense with his parent was , in a word : stunned . Oh , BTW , if you bring your 7 or 8 year old to this , be prepared to explain to them what the discussion " onanism " means after the film . Wow , onanism jokes in a flick about giant robots . They could have just downgraded this to a PG and inserted a few fart jokes peradventure , because , ya know … THAT would have been rum .

Oh , and never have I seen so much mass death in a film with so few casualty or injuries . Yay for PG-13 !

I ’ll tell you this , it ’s extremely likely youwon’tbe seeing a review of the inevitableTransformers 2by me on this site .

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Transformers, directed by Michael Bay, introduces audiences to a world where two factions of alien robots, the Autobots and Decepticons, bring their battle to Earth. Shia LaBeouf stars as Sam Witwicky, a teenager who becomes an unwitting participant in their conflict. The film showcases the heroic Autobots, led by Optimus Prime, as they strive to protect humanity from the malevolent Megatron and his Decepticon forces.

The only reason I rated this even 2 1/2 stars is due to Shia LeBeouf ’s performance . I count forrader to seeing him in future films .

So … I ’m ready . fire off .

transformer , directed by Michael Bay , introduces audiences to a macrocosm where two camarilla of alien robots , the Autobots and Decepticons , bring their battle to Earth . Shia LaBeouf stars as Sam Witwicky , a teen who becomes an unwitting participant in their difference of opinion . The picture showcases the heroic Autobots , lead by Optimus Prime , as they strive to protect manhood from the malevolent Megatron and his Decepticon effect .

The Autobots assemble on Earth in Transformers

Transformers (2007) - Poster - Optimus prime, bumblebee & megatron

Transformers, directed by Michael Bay, introduces audiences to a world where two factions of alien robots, the Autobots and Decepticons, bring their battle to Earth. Shia LaBeouf stars as Sam Witwicky, a teenager who becomes an unwitting participant in their conflict. The film showcases the heroic Autobots, led by Optimus Prime, as they strive to protect humanity from the malevolent Megatron and his Decepticon forces.